National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation is hands down one of the best Christmas movies we can watch each year to get in the holiday spirit. It is one of those movies that we quote so often, we may not even realize it. So we’ve gone through and picked out our favorite lines from this holiday staple. Did we include yours?
Yes, its a bit nipply out, I mean nippy out.
You about ready to do some kissin’?
Clark, Audrey’s frozen from the waist down. That’s all part of the experience, honey.
I’m sorry, this is our family’s first kidnapping.
Burn some dust here. Eat my rubber.
Can I refill your eggnog for you? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere? Leave you for dead?
‘Tis the season to be merry. That’s my name. No shit.
Worse? How could things get any worse? Take a look around here, Ellen. We’re at the threshold of hell.
And why is the carpet all wet, Todd? I don’t knoooooow, Margot!
Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. Kiss my ass. Kiss his ass. Kiss your ass. Happy Hanukkah.
It’s a one year membership in the jelly of the month club. Clark, that’s the gift that keeps on giving the whole year.
What’s that sound? You hear it? It’s a funny squeaky sound. You couldn’t hear a dump truck driving through a nitroglycerin plant.
Do you sleep with your brother? Do you know how sick and twisted that is? Well, I’m sleeping with your father. Don’t be so dramatic.
What are you looking at? Oh, the silent majesty of a winter’s morn…the clean, cool chill of the holiday air… an asshole in his bathrobe, emptying a chemical toilet into my sewer.
Hey Griswold. Where do you think you’re gonna put a tree that big? Bend over and I’ll show you. You’ve got a lot of nerve talking to me like that Griswold. I wasn’t talking to you.
If only I had that money Catherine and I gave to that TV preacher who was screwin’ that hockey player. What about the kids? Well, his kids can fend for themselves…
Is Rusty still in the Navy?
Don’t throw me down, Clark.
Oh, I was just smelling – smiling. I was just blouse – browsing. I, uh, heh heh. Well, I guess it just wouldn’t… Oh hee hee, it wouldn’t be the Christmas shopping season if the stores were any less hooter than they HOTTER than they are. Whew. It is warm in here, isn’t it?
Save the neck for me, Clark.
Surprised, Eddie? If I woke up tomorrow morning with my head sewn to the carpet I wouldn’t be more surprised than I am right now.
Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where’s the Tylenol?
We needed a chainsaw (laughs). We needed a tree..
We’re gonna have the hap-hap-happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny F**KING Kaye! And when Santa squeezes his fat white a** down that chimney tonight, he’s gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse.